If I were to die today.

if i were to die today.
i would like to thank Allah for the beautiful life.
if i were to die today.
i would like to ask forgiveness, may Allah accept my repentance.
if i were to die today.
i would like to enjoy every last seconds i have.
if i were to die today.
i would like to treat my friends better, for they deserve it.
if i were to die today.
i would like to make peace and clear all the grudges.
if i were to die today.
i would like to treasure my family more and love them better.
if i were to die today.
i would like to hug and kiss my mom and dad endlessly.
if i were to die today.
i would like to pat on my brothers' backs and congratulate them.
if i were to die today.
i would like to ask every person to forgive me.
if i were to die today.
i would like to sit with you, my dearest love of my life; all day long.

if i were to die today.
if; and only if.

('AR,2013)
09:31_07102013

forgive me,people.

for who i am.

for who i am not.

forgive me. please.

['AmyraRamlan]

Untuk kamu. Zauj-to-be. :)

Assalamualaikum.
To whom it may concern.

You has never been the least of my concern before. 
I didn't knew you back there, but I am glad that I've met you.
:)

It may have been a coincidence that we met during my bad days. It may have been a set up by Him, The Creator. Whatever it is, yet I am glad. Truly. You were there when everyone left me alone. You ride through the rain just to get me home safely. You patiently waited up for me during my check-ups, during my hospital visits and even when I was rushed to the emergency. For when I have no one else, you were there. I thank you.

During those days, I have to give up my passion. My societies, my programs, my games. I have to put it all aside. It was hard, indeed. As I have been living on those for the past 6 years. Those were my soul, they keep me alive each day. To have given up so fast, my heart shattered. I remember crying in front of you after my appointment with the doctor. When he said that I have to start strengthening my emotion for I have to let go of almost everything; I was broken-hearted. You know how much I love my passion. He told me how bad my condition can really be, how at the final stage of it I may have to be wheelchair-bound, how unstable my condition can turn to and such. I lose hope. My faith starts to shaken up. That was a year ago, where up until now, you haven't given up on me. I thank you. 

You were always there. You helped me through with my rehab process. You stand by my side, for you are afraid that I may fall down. You became my reminder for my pills and check ups. You became my 'punching bag' without any reasons. You listen to my random talks, you push me through the dark tunnels I am afraid of going into. You did your own research on my condition, and the available alternative treatment. I can't thank you enough for what you have done for me. Yet, I thank you.

Awak.
When you promised Abah that you'll take care of me, I'm amazed that you are willing to take such a huge responsibility. When you told me that you want to come and ask my hand for marriage, I can't help but to cry. Those were tears of happiness. I feel that I have given you nothing but being a burden to you. Yet, you still looking forward to build a future with me. For that, I thank you.

In less than a year, we have reached this level. 
I'm touched. I'm thankful. Alhamdulillah.

Holding that ring, asking me a question;

"Will you marry me and let me be your guardian angel?"

My answer will definitely be a '"YES".

Terima kasih awak.

p/s: i cried while writing this. ILY.

['AmyraRamlan]

For you. My SIX years history.

Assalamualaikum.

Awak. Ye saudara, ini untuk awak.
I know you'll read this, because you have always been checking out my blog. I know. 

Awak. You have been there for me since I first entered UiTM. You helped me through, a lot. You have been a buddy, a brother, a companion. I thank you for that. You have taught me countless facts of life. You've shared endless knowledge. I thank Allah for that.

After 6 years, there's one thing that has been always up on my mind. We had this relationship going nowhere. Yes, nowhere. I don't blame you. I don't blame myself. I don't blame Allah. He knows best for us. Well, things started to change. It seems like at a point, I know that we can't be together. Bukan sebab tak ada jodoh, tapi pada saya jodoh kita hanya setakat ini. Pasti ada sebab kenapa Allah temukan kita, dah izinkan kita bersahabat selama 6 tahun. Bukan sekejap. Itu satu tempoh yang cukup lama.

When we ended, you treated me like a stupid girl. Going around bashing me up, like it's my fault that we had to end our relationship. Saya kecewa. Amat. Kerana awak kenal keluarga saya. Umi dan Abah. Mal dan Adek. Mama's family, Ibu's family. My cousins. Awak kenal best friends saya, sahabat-sahabat saya, team kepimpinan saya. Yet, awak seolah tak redha bila kita jadi macam ni.

Maaf. Pada janji saya yang tak tertunai.
Maaf. Pada kata dusta andai ada terluah dalam kata saya.

Untuk yang terakhir kali, saya mohon. Izinkan saya lepaskan cerita kita. Izinkan saya lupakan awak. Please make this easy for me. Izinkan saya untuk buang segalanya. Tolong jangan simpan dendam, agar mudah untuk saya maafkan keegoan awak. Kita adalah sejarah. Saya telah miliki masa depan yang mana tiada nama awak di dalamnya.

Please.
For the last time.
Don't haunt me anymore.
The six years was a bless,
but it is a history I don't want to live in.

Please.
Let me go.

['AmyraRamlan]

Platform.

Assalamualaikum.
Hey fellas! :)

Sorry that I am not that keen to update my blog. It's just that I don't have much time to do so, and whenever I don't feel like blogging, I just randomly updated those through my Facebook status. Blog and media networking for me is just where I can share my thoughts, my feelings and my opinions. 

I used to talk. A lot. 
Maybe more than I am supposed to. 
I used to portray my words in random ways.
Maybe even those I am not supposed to.

Well, the thing is, people I've met, places I've been to, things I've done; those has taught me a lesson about life in their own unique ways. Which being without, won't make me the 'who' I am right now. Lessons learnt. Alhamdulillah. :)

Forgive me for who I am.

Forgive me for who I am not.

Either or, neither nor.

I can't be perfect.

Though I don't write much,

these words may be a remedy for some people.

Though I can't help much,

I hope these could leave prints all over town.

This is my platform.

It's how I live life. :)

['AmyraRamlan]

Do good deeds, people. :)

Assalamualaikum!
Hey peeps..

"Build good relationship with people around you.

Who knows, one day they may be the ones who are there to help you out."

('AR,2013)

Nak share a little story dengan korang.. Earlier tonight, my friend pinjam kereta, sebab nak fetch her friend.. When she returned back to the campus, she hand over the car keys back to me, and share babak dia nak masuk main gate kampus before that.. Dia kena tahan dengan polis bantuan.. Siap kena tanya, tu kereta siapa, nama tuannya siapa.. Of hearing my name, baru dia lepas masuk kampus.. Hee..

Well, for me, maybe sebab tuan polis bantuan tu kenal aku and he knows that is my car.. So dia rasa curious tengok orang lain yang drive.. Tu yang siap interrogate bagai tu.. Huhu.. Kesian Izzah.. I guess, he's one of the polis batuan yang pernah bekerja dengan aku dalam program kampus especially MDS.. Wallahualam.. Thanks, Tuan.. ^^

Just an insight~
Kita tak tahu apa akan jadi dengan masa depan kita.. Even a second coming upfront, is not in our hands to grab when the time is not there yet.. Kadang-kadang, kita takkan sangka, orang yang baru sangat kita kenal boleh tolong kita dengan cara yang baik.. Memang, to put trust in people is not an easy thing to do, but at least jagalah hubungan baik sesama manusia.. Tak salah pun.. Even to people who do bad to us, kita balas je dengan kebaikan.. Remember, Allah akan balas kebaikan kita bila kita ikhlas..

~Bantu sesama manusia untuk permudakan urusan mereka,

dan Allah akan bantu kita dengan mempermudahkan jalan kita.~ :)

Allah will always have a solution to any problems,
have tranquilizer for every pain,
have His own ways to show His love towards us.
Be good, feel the sweetness of life while it lasts, okay? :)

HabluminAllah wa Habluminannas

credit to~ http://hassan-thearmsquad.blogspot.com/

Much love;

['AmyraRamlan]

Wed. Perception.

Assalamualaikum.
Hey peeps! 

Been thinking lately, since aku pun dah dalam fasa nak menuju alam perkahwinan (ehem, In Shaa Allah soon).. Zaman sekarang ni, dah makin ramai orang yang terikut-ikut budaya luar bila nak kahwin.. Bertunang dah gaya macam nak bersanding, walimah dah gaya macam nak taraf anak raja.. Bukan nak kata tak boleh, boleh saja.. Cuma sebenarnya sebaik-baik pernikahan itu adalah yang rendah perbelanjaannya.. C'mon laa, aku bukan nak kata aku baik sangat.. Like I said, I've been thinking lately.. Al-maklumlah, bila usia dah meningkat ke tahap sebegini, kepala tak fikir lain dahh.. Habiskan Ijazah, kerja, kahwin, senangkan Ummi Abah, support adik-adik further studies.. Itu dalam kepala otak aku lah.. Hehe.. ;)

Been planning and discussing.. Eh hello, ingat plan nak kahwin tu senang ke? Susah tau.. Memang aku dok planning tak habis lagi dengan family and ehem, dia.. :) Well, siapa kata planning tu sekadar nak jemput tetamu kenduri berapa ratus, belanja makanan kenduri berapa ribu, baju pengantin nak berapa pasang, dewan nak hias liplap lampu berapa voltan bla bla bla.. 

I plan for my marriage, not my wedding

Walimah aku nanti maaflah kalau aku tak jemput ribu riban.. Family aku je dah konvoi.. Abah and Ummi punya sahabat handai je dah berapa ramai.. Kawan-kawan aku je dah seantero negara.. Hihi.. Tapi In Shaa Allah, aku utamakan classmates Degree and Diploma, aRMadians, sisters, SMF family, MDS families and schoolmates.. 
*Gosh, itupun dah berjela senarainya sayangss oii*

Yang lain tu bukan tak boleh datang, datanglah memeriahkan.. Aku alu-alukan.. :)
But do aware that my wedding won't be like the others.. Don't expect all those grand stage and karaoke session.. Don't think that you'll get to see big gown and flawless dress and glitters on the floor.. Sorry sayangs, I plan to do it modestly.. Jangan pernah terlintas nak berhutang okay.. Lagipun, kesian bakal suami nanti.. Dia lah kena sponsor wedding, dia jugak kena bagi nafkah nanti.. :)

Lagipun, nak membina rumah tangga tak sesukar yang persepsi masyarakat sekarang pandang.. 

“Sesungguhnya agama (Islam) itu ringan. Barangsiapa memperberat-berat, maka dia akan dikalahkan oleh agama. 

Oleh kerana itu, kerjakanlah (agama itu) menurut mestinya, atau mendekati mestinya, dan gembiralah (kerana akan beroleh pahala), serta beribadatlah (mohonlah pertolongan Allah) pada waktu pagi, petang dan sebahagian malam.” (Hadis Riwayat Bukhari)

1. Yang pertama, merisik.. Jadi syarat supaya keluarga bertemu keluarga, capai kata sepakat nak satukan hati anak-anak.. 

2. Yang kedua, bertunang.. Tak perlu pelamin, hantaran bagai.. Bertunang cukup sekadar tanda, kalau tidak pun, cukup atas persetujuan si adam dan hawa, dan sebagai tanda hormat, persetujuan ibu ayah.. Al-maklumlah, ibu ayah yang besarkan anak-anak selama ni kan, mestilah diorang nak tahu jugak bakal suri hidup anak lelaki dan bakal 'guardian angel' hidup si anak perempuan.. 

3. Yang ketiga, pernikahan.. Siapa kata nikah kena hantaran mahal-mahal? Bagi bakal isteri kasut tumit tinggi branded, padahal dia selesa pakai kasut yang boleh tahan lasak.. Bagi bakal suami baju kemeja branded, padahal dia senang lagi pakai T-shirt.. Hantaran, sekadar hadiah untuk bakal pendamping hidup.. Bukan untuk tunjuk merata buat halwa pandangan mata manusia.. Baju nikah, tak perlulah nak macam princess, kalau sudahnya nak berjalan pun payah.. Duit hantaran, tak perlulah keluarga nak letak macam gaya nak jual anak.. :)

Sabda Rasulullah SAW. yang bermaksud: 

"Sesungguhnya yang besar berkat nikah ialah yang sederhana belanjanya ". 

( Hadis Riwayat Ahmad )

4. Yang keempat, kenduri atau walimah.. Pernah aku baca, cukup kalau sekadar jamu seekor kambing, which in fact hanya boleh cover perut dalam 50 orang tetamu.. Tapi iyelah, aku faham.. Kawan-kawan ramai.. Ahli keluarga besar pun boleh buat rombongan.. Tak salah nak jemput reramai, tapi belanjanya berpada-padalah.. Tak perlulah nak feast sampai berhabis ribuan ringgit.. Yang penting, walimah untuk bagitau orang tentang perkahwinan supaya tak timbul fitnah, dan untuk meraikan hari bahagia.. And, the most important thing, doa dari tetamu.. :)

Rasulullah mengetahui sahabatnya ‘Abdurrahman B. ‘Auf baru sahaja bernikah, Rasulullah pun berkata kepadanya (sambil terlebih dahulu mendoakannya):

“Barakallahu laka (semoga Allah memberi berkah kepadamu), adakanlah walimah walaupun hanya dengan seekor kambing.” (Hadis Riwayat al-Bukhari, Kitab an-Nikah, 16/131, no. 4758)

So, to those yang suka nak ada persepsi, perception or whatever lah, go ahead.. You can say anything you want.. Aku dah bagitahu siap-siap, wedding aku takkan capai taraf 5-star, takkan grand macam retis, takkan gempak macam aku popular sangat.. Okay? So if you are going to come just to condemn and criticize, just do come.. Jangan lupa, lepas habis komen, condemn dan sebagainya, selitkanlah sedikit doa buat kami ya.. Masehhh.. ^^v

"Tak hairanlah orang zaman sekarang takut nak lunaskan sunnah melangsungkan sebuah perkahwinan.

Persepsi keluarga dan masyarakat pun dah terlalu menduga untuk sesuatu yang halal dan dituntut agama."

p/s: Maaf. Ini luahan rasa hati dan fikiran akal hamba.

Mohon jangan ada yang terasa ya. :)

with love;

['AmyraRamlan]

Pieces of my mind.

" Sakit Allah duga buat jadi penghapus dosa,
tak sesakit ditimbang neraca manusia tanpa usul periksa."

('AR_12:33_15022013)

"Tak mudah menyerah tak bersalah.
Tetap terasa pedihnya resah.
Tapi sekurang-kurangnya pernah.
Biar menjauh tanpa kalah."

('AR_15:31_17022013)

"Menghadapi dugaan diuji sakit itu.
Sakit itu perasaannya amat indah.
Mendampingi orang yang sedang diduga itu.
Sungguh,dengan sakit itu anugerah."

('AR_00:02_18022013)

HakciptaCikEmpunyaBlog.

['AmyraRamlan]

BB1M 2013

Assalamualaikum. =)

Just to share a bit, betapa beruntungnya berada di bumi bertuah bernama Malaysia. Alhamdulillah. All IPT students, swasta dan awam diberi voucher worth RM250 per student. Bolehlah digunakan untuk beli keperluan untuk study. Hee. Last year pun dapat jugak, RM200. Syukur, rezeki menjadi mahasiswa universiti di tanah tercinta.

Ada yang cakap, 'kenapa 80% kena guna untuk beli buku, dan baki 20% baru boleh beli alat tulis dan barang-barang lain?'
Well, bersyukurlah. RM250 tu bukan sikit jumlahnya tau.

Ini hasil shopping worth RM50. ;)

the best part shop kat Popular, sebab even guna voucher pun dapat discount for members. Untung! ^^

Use it wise. Think positive. Be grateful. =)

Mahasiswi.TanahMelayu.

['AmyraRamlan]

Ignorance; by Paramore

If I'm a bad person, you don't like me
Well I guess I'll make my own way
It's a circle
A mean cycle
I can't excite you anymore
Where's your gavel? Your jury?
What's my offense this time?
You're not a judge but if you're gonna judge me
Well sentence me to another life
Don't wanna hear your sad songs
I don't wanna feel your pain
When you swear it's all my fault
Cause you know we're not the same (no)
We're not the same (no)
Oh we're not the same
Yeah the friends who stuck together
We wrote our names in blood
But I guess you can't accept that the change is good (hey)
It's good (hey)
It's good

Well you treat me just like another stranger
Well it's nice to meet you sir
I guess I'll go
I best be on my way out
You treat me just like another stranger
Well it's nice to meet you sir
I guess I'll go
I best be on my way out

Ignorance is your new best friend
Ignorance is your new best friend

This is the best thing that could've happened
Any longer and I wouldn't have made it
It's not a war no, it's not a rapture
I'm just a person but you can't take it
The same tricks that, that once fooled me
They won't get you anywhere
I'm not the same kid from your memory
Well now I can fend for myself

Don't wanna hear your sad songs
I don't wanna feel your pain
When you swear it's all my fault
Cause you know we're not the same (no)
We're not the same (no)
Oh we're not the same
Yeah we used to stick together
We wrote our names in blood
But I guess you can't accept that the change is good (hey)
It's good (hey)
It's good

Well you treat me just like another stranger
Well it's nice to meet you sir
I guess I'll go
I best be on my way out
You treat me just like another stranger
Well it's nice to meet you sir
I guess I'll go
I best be on my way out

Conspiracy; by Paramore

*Here's to all who holds conspiracy against people.
Speak out, there's no need to hold conspiracy against them.
They have ears and eyes.*

Please speak softly, for they will hear us
And they'll find out why we don't trust them
Speak up dear, 'cause I cannot hear you
I need to know why we don't trust them

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I've lost my power

Where can I turn? 'Cause I need something more
Surrounded by uncertainty, I'm so unsure
Tell me why I feel so alone
'Cause I need to know to whom do I owe

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I've lost my power

I thought that we'd make it
Because you said that we'd make it through
And when all security fails
Will you be there to help me through?

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I've lost my power
How?

How I've lost my power?